'Objectives'.

There are a few phrases that skiers, hikers, climbers, and others use that bug me. The worst is 'meadow skipping'. This is a phrase used by skiers to describe short, safe, low-angle runs often taken when the avalanche danger is high, but when I hear it I can't help but think that the skiers are a bunch of fairies dressed in renaissance garb. The other is 'objective'. This means 'goal' to everyone else, but when a climber uses it he is generally implying that he is going to climb and ski something most other people only read about in ski magazines. I usually hear this used in forums or at parties and rarely ever do I see that the 'objective' was obtained; I can only use when I'm talking in my head and then only as irony. A much-maligned phrase that I do like, however, is 'dawn patrol'. This means being on the mountain before the sun comes up. I know, it makes me sound like some sort of Israeli commando when I use it, but I do like to wake up early.

Whatever. No one in these parts has been doing any of this lately. Missoulians are notorious late sleepers, for starters, and we are at the time of year when there is not a well-defined sunrise. The sky brightens north of northwest near 5 am and grows brighter further to the south. But that's only if you can actually get a reading on the sun. We're in our usual monsoon season here, where May can have as much snow as February, and clouds and storm have been the rule.

And that has knocked out any sort of 'objective'-making. I'll admit that some hardy souls do it, but it's pretty hard to ski anything big in a raging May snowstorm. So the 'objectives' have been more like, Well, let's see how far we get. Not that far. And the meadows? Melted out. And then of course once I'm off the mountain the sun comes out, and people go to the park.